Monday, January 25, 2010

Monday morning stuff

If this blog post is disjointed, please blame the fact that I caught a terrible cold from Vivian this weekend- and since I'm still nursing, I can't have any good drugs. So I'm just wandering around with a muddled head. Oh, and doing some actual work this morning for my job! That's going to be some quality work product right there, let me tell you.

So, last night Daniel and I were able to escape from the house for a few hours and attend a wonderful talk by John and Stasi Eldredge, called Love and War. Ironically, it was held at the exact same mega-church on the exact same day that I attended a women's conference last year. Kind of weird.

We were so glad we went. As I've mentioned here before, Daniel and I have a good marriage, but we've also been married less than 4 years, and in that time we had two babies and he changed jobs twice and we moved and my work situation has been in constant flux.... just a lot of transitions to deal with. Also as I've mentioned before, our church has a LOT of strong points. We love our church and are so blessed to be a part of it. But marriage counseling and mentoring is not a strength of our church at this point, so we've been trying hard to find other resources.  Like the Family Life Today podcasts and CDs and whatever other resources we come across.

This Love and War conference was a good one for us, because it was short and to the point. And it addressed a lot of great issues, including the idea of what we allow ourselves to believe that isn't true.  This has been a particular struggle of mine- Daniel and I do not speak the same love language, and I allow myself to believe the lie that because he is not expressing love in the way that I want, then he isn't expressing love. Which is so untrue when I stop and step back and think about things.  I also allow myself to believe the lie that I "deserve" to be grouchy in the evenings after a hard day with the kids, and say whatever I want to Daniel without thinking about how it will affect him. And please keep in mind, I'm being grouchy and snippy with him while he's bathing the toddler and brushing the toddler's teeth and sometimes cooking dinner and doing whatever else he sees around the house, after working a 10-12 hour day. Yeah, that's not such a good thing for me to be doing.

I know I'm going to have to remind myself of this a lot, but I hope I can stay on track for a few days at least. My marriage is an incredible blessing and I am so fortunate to get to spend my life with my best friend. He's an amazing man and I am so glad God brought him into my life. Now I need to focus on treating him like the treasure he is.

If the Love and War tour is coming to your town, I highly recommend attending. It's just a few hours out of your evening, but such a great use of a few hours.

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