Friday, October 24, 2014

And on and on it goes.

There was another school shooting today. In a small town just north of here where Vivian and I went on Saturday for a princess ball.  So sad. This world is such a depressing place sometimes.

It's Friday and I've been trying to get laundry and cleaning and work done.  Interrupted by a call from the school to let me know that Ethan had thrown up in the lunchroom. He doesn't seem sick, but I went and picked him up early anyway. 

Ethan getting a stomach flu is a particular fear of mine right now.  Last week I finally got around to taking the kids in for their well child appointments and both weighed in at 36 pounds. Which put Ethan in the 0.09th percentile for weight.  He has a BMI of just over 12.  I can't wrap my brain around that.  It was very discouraging, because we're now three years into him having the feeding tube in his stomach and I am so very tired of it.  I am so very tired of spending my days keeping track of how many calories he's eaten or not eaten.  And just when we make progress, then he gets sick.  And because he is so tiny, we can't let him play soccer or do sports that would burn too many calories, because he needs all of the calories for brain growth and physical development. Chess club it is!

He's been dealing with all of this food stuff for over five years now. He eats, but he's so far behind that just eating a normal amount is never going to cut it.

And he's so far behind in school too, despite all of the multitudes of specialists and therapists and everyone that he sees. I'm so grateful to have such a support team behind me, because it does get discouraging. He tries so hard and means well. It's just that everything is a struggle for him and sometimes he doesn't want to bother with it.

And then there's Vivian.  She's never attempted anything that she wasn't successful at within a short time. I refuse to explain how driving a car works to her, because I fear what she would do with that knowledge.  Everything is easy for her.  And it's great that I don't have to worry about her in the same way, but since they are so close in age and only one grade apart in school, it makes it more complicated to have one kid struggling and one not.

I need a nap. And a drink. Thank goodness it's Friday.

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