Friday, May 30, 2014

In which I debate drinking before 9 AM. Oh, and the school year just needs to end already.

Ethan keeps coming home and telling me exactly how many days are left in the school year. Which leads me to believe his teacher may be as excited about the end of the year as I am. 

This morning was fairly awful.  The only redeeming feature was that it took place on a Friday, so I don't have to do it again tomorrow.

7:40 AM. Daniel kisses me goodbye and cheerfully clomps down the stairs in his bike shoes and bikes off to work.  (Side note- yesterday he got up at 5:30, went to spinning class, came home, biked to work, then biked home after work. He also fell asleep on the couch at 8 PM.  This training for his big bike ride is making him less than interesting in the evenings.  Also, I am deeply suspicious of anyone who voluntarily exercises that much). 

7:41 AM. I get out of bed. Vivian whines at me and begs for one more snuggle. Oh, she's in my bed. Because she's started showing up there again at 3 AM. We do not have the energy to argue with her at 3 AM.  However, she is turning 5 on Sunday and takes up the majority of our bed, so something must be done. Eventually.

7:42 AM. I try to get Ethan to wake up, reminding him that today is the jog-a-thon at school and that he can take a stuffed animal to school. I tell him to be sure to not forget his stuffed animal.

7:45 AM Kids make it to the kitchen and stare at me blankly when I ask them what they would like for breakfast. I give them cheerios  and Vivian goes to get the yogurt. She pulls the yogurt out of the fridge and knocks over the carton of eggs. Fortunately, only one breaks, but I have to try to figure out how to get it out of the carton without making too much mess. Before drinking coffee. Kids stare at their breakfast in confusion, then finally begin to eat the cereal. One piece at a time.

7:46 AM. I drink as much coffee as I can in one gulp, take my vitamins and get Ethan's lunch out of the fridge. 

7:48 AM. I suggest to the children that they should maybe eat a little faster and go off to shower.

7:58 AM. I am showered and dressed. Kids have eaten a small fraction of their breakfast.  I again suggest eating more quickly. They stare at me blankly.

8 AM.  Time to end the misery of breakfast and get dressed. I remind Vivian that she has gymnastics today and needs to dress appropriately.  Ethan is told that he can wear any pair of shorts and short sleeved shirt. On my way to dry my hair, I remind them that they do not need to change their underwear, as it is still clean (they like to change at least 3 times per day, necessitating lots of laundry on my part). 

8:03 AM.  I am drying my hair and ignoring the fact that Ethan is yelling something at me from his bedroom. Trying to break the kids of the "screaming at mommy from the other side of the house" habit, as it is annoying and scares the neighbors. 

8:04 AM.  Ethan comes to see me in the bathroom, dressed only in underwear. He needs to inquire as to whether he should change his underwear. I assure him he does not.  He then leaves, only to return shortly afterward, asking what to wear (see 8 AM). 

8:06. Hallelujah! Ethan is dressed! And he manages to go get his lunchbox and put it in his backpack. And even gets his shoes on the right feet! I am a good mother after all!

8:07 AM. Vivian is still not dressed, but has pulled out a short dress to wear to gymnastics. Discuss the fact with her that she needs to wear leggings. There are no leggings in her drawer.  Convince her to wear shorts under her dress. Convince her that this is not going to ruin her fashionable outfit.  Convince her that no one will think the outfit looks funny.  Become deeply concerned about her teenage years. 

8:15. I have no idea what happened between 8:07 and 8:15.  Mornings are not my thing.  I can tell you, there was no coffee consumed. 

8:16 Kids at front door.  Ethan has backpack on and has managed to keep his shoes on. Vivian, however, is still putting on her socks. Then decides that her socks are on the wrong feet. And then one of them is backwards.  Have used up all negotiating power with the shorts, so just stand in entryway and feel tired.

8:20 We made it to the car!

8:25 We made it to the place where we park to walk the last block to school! I unhook Ethan's carseat and ask him to put on his jacket and backpack. Unhook Vivian. Ethan gets out of the car without his backpack. I try not to yell.  He stares at me blankly when I tell him to get his backpack, then finally figures out what I'm talking about. I frequently wonder if my kids speak English.

8:30 We made it to school! Am chatting with my friend and dreaming of the cup of coffee that I'm going to drink while Vivian and I wait for Ethan's class's turn in the jog-a-thon. 

8:35 Bell rings. Ethan goes in school. Coffee is close, I can feel it! My friend tells her daughter goodbye and reminds her that her stuffed animal is in her backpack. I refrain from swearing and drag Vivian quickly back to the car to get Ethan's stuffed animal.

8:45 Back at school with the stuffed animal.

8:50 Coffee! I drink a few gulps as we eat a breakfast sandwich. We then walk to the school playground to kill time while waiting for Ethan. 

9:00 I drop my 3/4 full cup of coffee, splattering it everywhere and losing its caffeinated goodness.  Refrain from swearing or crying, somehow.

I miss vacation.

In other news, have purchased store-bought cupcakes for the party tomorrow. Have decided firmly against treat bags. Am quality parent.


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