Monday, August 19, 2013

Totally random things about me

It's the first day back at grad school, so I'm procrastinating..... BIG TIME.  I swear, cobwebs have taken over all of my brain space since April.  Ugh. 

So, for your reading enjoyment, here are random things about me. 

1) I get asked for directions constantly.  I have a few theories as to why.  First of all, I'm short and chubby, so very non-threatening.  Second, I walk fast and look purposeful. Maybe I look like I know where I'm going.  I've been asked for directions pretty much everywhere, including in foreign countries. It's really weird.

2) I love filling out forms.  When else in life do I have all of the answers? The exception to this is immunization forms. Those kill me.

3) My kids collect rocks. But not fancy rocks.  We're talking pieces of gravel or random medium-sized brown/grey rocks. 

4) I dislike the outdoors intensely.  I do not get along with sweating, dirt or bugs.  But in the past 18 months I have climbed a glacier, gone ziplining, done an aerial rope course, explored a series of caves, kayaked (twice!), ridden a bike, and camped.  It's disturbing.

5)  I have an insane phobia of calling people on the phone.  I blame the summer I worked as a telemarketer and then in a customer service phone bank and the fact that I had to answer the phone a lot when I was a kid and be polite to the church members who were calling (my dad is a pastor) and I used up all my phone skills then.  I now only call my grandmother.  And when people call me, I often don't answer the phone. I have issues.

6) I don't like reading books to my kids, because when I read books out loud, I have to read them in order. When I read to myself, I read a paragraph or two at a time, not necessarily in order and not all of the words.  This method has served me well for 30 odd years, including in school and my old job, when I was known for my skills as a document summarizer.  It does not translate to reading to kids and I'm having to read more carefully for this round of classes as well, since I'm often reading document from hundreds of years ago. But for the fluffy chick lit stuff and fiction that I read on my own, it works fine.

7) I come from a long line of women that are terrible and disinterested cooks. Actually, more disinterested than terrible. We just don't care enough to try hard.  The men in the family are great cooks (but don't cook the main meals).  My male cousin is actually thinking about attending cooking school, and his sister can't cook. That's just how things go in my family.

Monday, August 12, 2013

The 0.14th percentile

Ethan had his well child appointment today. He not only failed the hearing test (okay, so maybe he isn't just ignoring me?), but he actually weighed in 2 pounds LESS than last year.  And 1 pound less than in February.  He's now in the 0.14th percentile for weight.  7th percentile for height though, so that's good.  I'm dealing with the after effects of this appointment by eating lunch and continuing my march into the 1 trillionth percentile for weight.  DAMN IT.  We have to go back to Children's soon for yet another appointment with the GI clinic and I am so tired of all of this. It's been going on for four years now and we are worn out.

We've been using Ethan's feeding tube and he's been eating and drinking his supplement, but he is SO active and never ever stops moving and burns off all of the calories that he takes in.  I need to infuse him with some of my slothlike behavior of late.

The weekend at my grandmother's was mostly good. Hard emotionally and weird to help take care of my grandmother in such a personal way.  I was able to do one night of the caretaking and my aunt got a full night's sleep, which made the trip worth it. And we were there with lots of relatives to celebrate grandma/my great aunt's birthday yesterday.

Oh, and also, my BABY TURNED SIX!!! Please someone tell me how that happened!

Ethan at six is funny and loves everyone. He's never met a stranger and loves peppering new acquaintances with questions about their favorite colors and sports teams.  He also is fond of saying "what's your number?" which means "how old are you?", but comes across very differently sometimes! He loves every sport in the entire world and his life goal is to win American Ninja Warrior and be a Seattle Mariner when he grows up.  I love this little kid that made me a mom- he's such a blessing to us.

Friday, August 9, 2013

An elephant is sitting on my lungs

I'm heading off tomorrow with the kids to stay with my grandmother for a few days. I'm mostly feeling 1) guilty that I didn't get down there before, 2) horribly terrified that I will be useless and 3) scared out of my mind about losing my grandmother. Honestly, she's doing well. She is turning 87 on Sunday and not in good physical health, but made it through a broken leg (which has a really high mortality rate in older people) and a surgery in which she lost a lot of blood and a long recovery. So she's doing well.

But she's still turning 87 on Sunday.  And Daniel's parents are in their late 70s. We got started on kids 10 years later than our parents did, and honestly, none of our parents had kids very young. So our parents are 10 years older than our grandparents were. I'm 36 and have one biological grandparent (and one foster grandparent who is only 13 years older than my dad, who himself is considered a senior citizen at this point) left.  Every time I think of my kids growing up without knowing their great-grandparents (who I was fortunate enough to know in several cases) or even their grandparents, I descend into a mass of tears and feeling guilty for not finding a husband/getting engaged/married/pregnant faster than I did. Which I did pretty quickly, for me.

Family history really matters to me.  I've always been interested in it- my dad's side of the family is a spaghetti mess of marriage and divorce and I don't even know what and my mom's side is pretty normal, and my husband's side is even more messy than my dad's side (multiple simultaneous wives in the old Chinese world and leaving wives to marry new ones at the same time in the not-so-accepting of that! world and who knows who is related to whom, they are all uncles and aunts!) but I want my kids to know who they are and where they've come from. And losing these older generations before the kids are old enough to care is a big blow.

And I'm just not ready to say goodbye and explain to Ethan and Vivian where these people who they love have gone. I'm a massive wimp in terms of unpleasantness and sadness. I just am not ready for this. Whenever it happens and whatever form. It's not here yet, but I'm still not ready. And I doubt I ever will be.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

My next free weekend is in 2015

Back in June my grandmother fell and broke her leg. She was in rehab for a while, then came home and my aunt has been managing her care.  I really should have gone down before, but between travel and the whole family getting absolutely leveled by the worst stomach bug of all times, I haven't gotten my act together and gone down there.

But this weekend is her birthday (Ethan's as well- Grandma's first comment when I called to tell her about Ethan, was to say "couldn't you have waited another 2 hours so he was born on my birthday?"  Given that we'd been trying to evict him for a solid week (failed induction! Fun!), I let her know that that wasn't actually possible), so the kids and I are heading down on Friday to help out and celebrate.

She made some comment today about me helping out with the cooking, which proves that the medications have gotten to her, since I am a product of her family and am therefore a terrible cook.  We have a long tradition of the women in the family being terrible cooks.  We'd really rather just read a book.  So that should be interesting.

I'm glad to be going down, although I am a little discouraged lately about her getting older and Daniel's parents really starting to age.  Heck, Daniel's going to be closer to 50 than 40 after his birthday next month.  I'm still not ready to be a grown up, much less a middle-aged one. 

School starts for me in just under two weeks, so that'll be fun to add back into the mix. Along with having various travel plans and family in town every weekend until Ethan and Vivian head back to school in September.  I'm being as slothful as possible in the interim.  I try to only accomplish one task per day. Don't want to strain myself :)