I'm home with one kid this morning. Vivian is at school and Daniel's at work and Ethan's watching Blue's Clues and I'm contemplating my to-do list for the day. And my to-do list is making me smile, because I'm only focusing on one of the two things I've been juggling lately. For the past 8 weeks, it's been so crazy busy with the travel site and with my class. I thought I was handling it well. I thrive on busyness and stress! I can do it all (except remembering to cook dinner. Or fold the laundry. Why do we have to eat dinner every day! And where does all that laundry keep coming from!).
And then I had to go in to my doctor last week for a regular check up. I've had a minor heart issue and high blood pressure since I was 21. I have had high blood pressure when I was thin and when I was heavy. Exercise helps a bit, so I try to keep that up. But my blood pressure is very sensitive to stress, and as much as I'm loving life lately, there is a lot of stress right now. And when the nurse took my blood pressure last Tuesday, she actually shrieked a little bit when she saw the numbers. Let's just say they were all in the triple digits. In case you're not familiar with blood pressure readings, that's bad.
So...that's not going to work for long...
Since my appointment I've been trying to juggle less and focus more. There's always going to be something I "could" be doing. But that doesn't mean I have to. This week I'm not going to worry about what's coming up on the travel site, I'm going to just study for my midterm. Next week when grad school is on fall break (hurray!!! hurray!!!) I can do more travel site work. I just have to keep telling myself to focus on ONE thing. I don't have to do it all right away. Some of the work can wait and be done later! (This is a revolutionary idea for me, really).
My blood pressure is much better this week- I think giving myself permission to stop occasionally and put things on tomorrow's to-do list, or even next week's to-do list is having a big effect on my stress level. Who knew!