I'm pretty sure that nights spent in the hospital are the longest kind. By my count, this is my 11th night spent in the hospital in my life. The most amusing night ever spent in the hospital was when I had my appendix out- I remember the nurses walking into my room to check on me and being shocked by the volume of snoring coming from my mom over in the corner.
Most of the other nights in the hospital were when the kids were born. Long nights when we were trying to get Ethan to come out, long nights recovering from c-sections, one long night when I was admitted at 34 weeks with Vivian for steroid shots and possible early delivery.
Tonight was tough. Ethan pulled his tube halfway out once and had to go through having it put back in. We've had nurses in and out and now a new roommate- one who is much sicker than Ethan and one who is breaking my heart as I hear his mom filling the nurse in on all the details of his illness.
There've been many moments of doubt tonight. Wondering if we did the right thing, wondering how on earth I'm going to handle this. Not looking forward to Ethan waking up and realizing that he still has a tube in his nose.
But daylight will be here soon and the time for doubting and worrying will be done, and it'll be time to pull up my big girl pants, trust that Ethan is in God's hands, and get on with what needs to be done. Because I'm a mom, and that's what we do.