Thursday, July 29, 2010

Oh my goodness.

I just emailed my company and resigned completely.


I've been working there for SEVEN years. And that's after about a bazillion and a half years of school to get the degree to be able to work there.

But I'm also 100% sure that God is not wanting this for us anymore. I've been hanging on to this job "just in case" and putting my hope on it as my safety net.  And it was getting hard to do even small tasks well- when the kids are insanely running around, concentration is tough.  I kept thinking that I just needed to hang on until the kids go to school, but that's still 3 years away for Ethan.

In the end, it's better to go out on a high note than to hang on and continue to do my work with only part of my time and attention. I'd rather leave good memories of my work, in case I do go back in the future, rather than messing things up and not being liked anymore. And I owe my kids my full time and attention. This is the job that I need to focus on right now.

I still feel a little ill. It was so hard to hit send on that email.


Andrea said...

Good for you!

I had to do the same thing this last Christmas. I taughtprivate voice lessons to 40 kids a week up until the day I had Emma, then 2 weeks later started teaching from our house, then tried to go back on campus last August, and it ruined breast feeding for me by 6 months, she liked the freedom of looking around with a bottle....the girls kept getting sick all last fall. There was so much guilt in leaving them and I felt like a bad Mom, and like I was only doing a 1/2 a**ed job teaching with my mind other places.

I feel for you. Quitting is hard. Especially at a job where they beg you not to

Lizzie said...

Oooh, yikes. I imagine that step was super hard for you. You're such a great mommy and such a great worker, doing okay at either one would never be good enough for you, so I admire your resolve and your strength! xo

maggie said...

Kick ass Carrie! I am a big fan of Quitting Jobs. I hope this gives you more peace in your day to day. Woo!

Ashley said...

Wow. I'm glad you did what you felt right about! I'm sure it will be a good decision for you and your family. :)