Monday, March 1, 2010

In our family we have high-maintenance versus low-maintenance

In our family there are two distinct personalities:

Myself and Ethan. HIGH MAINTENANCE.  Yes, that has to be capitalized. Everything is seriously dramatic. EVERYTHING.  We drop a toy- we expect the world to stop and worry and pick it up and give it to us and be concerned about everything.

Those other two people. In our case, Daniel and Vivian. We've discussed Daniel's patient, unbelievably good-natured self here ad nauseum. Today Vivian exhibited the fact that she is her father's daughter during her 9-month appointment. Everything was fine and good and the nurse exclaimed over and over about her good nature. And then the nurse gave Vivian the first of two shots and Vivian didn't even cry. And then the nurse gave Vivian the second shot and Vivian obligingly whined a bit and then got over it within about 0.1 seconds.  The nurse looked at me in utter confusion.  I informed her that yes, I know Vivian is the easiest baby ever, and that she is always this happy.

It's so confusing for a high-maintenance person to be the wife and mother of low-maintenance people. When I'm upset, I tell people. In fact, I tell EVERYONE.  But nice, good-natured people have to be drawn out and worked on and time has to be spent on their emotions. I spend a lot of time praying these days to understand the happy, kind, good-natured people in my life. I'm so very grateful for them. But I don't understand them at all.

We went to Victoria this weekend. It was a good trip. Insane, as trips with two small kids tend to be, but good. Except we returned at 9 PM last night to a dead car battery. Our car is high maintenance like Ethan and I. It was again dead at 8:45 this morning, so the kids and I had to sprint on foot to the doctor's office for Vivian's 9 AM appointment. But we made it just a few minutes late and everything was well.

In other news,  I'm trying to end my lonely, never-seeing-anyone-all-week life and am planning to visit a MOPS group on Wednesday. I am TERRIFIED. Visiting the MOPS group involves me talking to strangers, which I am SO bad at, and my toddler behaving while hanging out with other kids, which he also is so bad at. People, we spend 99.999% of our time at home, alone, with no interactions. We have no idea how to behave in the outside world. Vivian will be fine and will flirt and be cute and whatever.  But Ethan and I will probably alienate everyone and they will not want us to come back and I will be lonely and sad forever. (And you thought I was exaggerating about the whole high-maintenance thing :) )

I am so worried that no one will want to talk to me and that I will say the wrong things if they do and that I will leave more lonely than I arrive.  I want to wear a sign that says "Be patient with me, I'm a nice, deeply caring person, but terrible at small talk."

In other news, ultrasounds for my two newly pregnant friends have had good news. Please keep praying for them if you're praying people. We have a LONG way to go.

1 comment:

Andrea said...

Awe, of course people will want to talk to you. Just be yourself. Tell people you joined the group as an alternative to going out of your All moms feel sort of down and lonely from time to time staying home...

I am the high maintenance in our family. Both of my girls are easy natured for the most part like their Daddy. William is quiet and withdrawn at parties and says I make friends wherever I go. I think it's because I have no inner monologue...?