It is so SO much easier to start work at 6:30 AM when it's actually daylight. And so much less scary to take the bus and walk through downtown streets to work. Now if Seattle could just get the memo that the longer days mean it's supposed to be summer....
So, last night I went to the Opting In/Opting Out panel discussion. For details on the speakers, go here- I'm at work and don't have the program with me. The whole event was organized by Parent Map, which I was not familiar with, but plan to use as a resource in the future. I arrived about 30 minutes early, after fairly minimal driving around and looking for parking and cursing Capitol Hill (the most difficult place in Seattle to find parking). I got my ticket and my goody bag and my cupcake (from Cupcake Royale, which we'd just visited for the first time this weekend. So yummy!) And I got a glass of very nice white wine by O Wine. After that I awkwardly stood in a corner of the room, trying to balance my cupcake and bag and wine and hors d'oeuvres, and not tried not to look like I felt- like I was back in middle school, on the first day of school with no one to talk to.
Thankfully I was able to eat quickly and headed upstairs for the panel discussion. Given that I get up at 5 AM on Wednesdays, I knew I was going to have to duck out early, so got a prime spot in the back row, next to the door. The panel discussion was really interesting- it was moderated by Mona Locke, a former first lady of Washington State. And my goodness, that woman has had some serious life transitions in the last 15 years! I'm amazed by all she's been through and all she's accomplished. All the other women who spoke were equally impressive and I really appreciated their honesty about their struggles in balancing motherhood and work. I could really relate to their admissions of struggling to find their identity outside of their work title. It's definitely an ongoing struggle for me.
I'm glad I went last night and am sorry I didn't get to hear the whole panel discussion. I went home feeling a little overwhelmed, to be honest, since it's been kind of a rough week at work and at home (and it was only Tuesday night...). But when I got home, Ethan woke up and I was able to spend some time snuggling with him and chatting with Daniel. And that made things alright. It's a tough job, being a mom. There's no doubt about that. And I say that, knowing I have an easy baby and a husband who really should be eligible for sainthood. It's still tough. And I'm daily trying to find my balance while feeling like someone keeps shifting the weights on the other side of the teeter-totter. But I know I'm not alone- that there are so many moms out there going through the same thing, and I'm so very glad.